Friday, January 25, 2008

Top 10 Changes John McCain Will Make If Elected President

10) "Hail to the Chief" will be replaced with the tune "What Shall We Do With A Drunken Sailor?"

9) Freedom of political speech will be protected, except for the part about speaking freely about politics.

8) Jefferson Memorial will be converted into an Indian casino.

7) To rid politics of the corrupting influence of money, all political contributions will be confiscated and stored for "safekeeping" at McCain Reelection Headquarters.

6) Lincoln Memorial will be converted into overflow housing for the growing hordes of amnestied illegal aliens.

5) "Pussy" landing gear will be removed from Air Force One.

4) In order to keep the public from losing faith in its government, the public will be shot.

3) Whitehouse bathrooms will be stocked with two-ply, super-absorbent copies of the Constitution.

2) "Bunker-buster" nukes will be developed and used against NRA and ACLU headquarters.

1) [This one's up to you. Post your suggestions below.]

1 comment:

Bawb said...

Using the McCain Illegal Alien logic of "There's too many and we can't possibly catch them all", Amensty will also be extended to murderers, rapists, and armed robbers.