We have been fortunate indeed here at das blog to receive a covert behind-the-scenes recording of Senator Barack Hussein Obama, live from Havana, Cuba, where he continues his world-wide Tour of Pandering to show he is not just as an American presidential candidate, but a "citizen of the world" who is deeply concerned about saving the planet and securing the Oval Office.
HUSSEIN: My friends and neighbors, we are facing a monumental chance for change here today. And change is hope, and hope is our future. Because without modulation, we cannot have change, and without change there is no hope, and hope brings assurance, and assurance solidifies our future...
CNN: Swoon! He must truly be the Second Coming! He is so wonderful!
HUSSEIN: I promise you today that as your hope for future change I will be extremely vague and amorphous in my definitions of change, hope, or even future. In this manner we, as Americans, can all work together as one, since this great sweeping promise of reassurance is sufficiently indistinct to allow each and every one of you to believe it means whatever it is that you wish to believe at this moment and, more importantly, when you vote in November...
CBS: Katie just came in her pants and passed out!
Just as our forefathers, and their forefathers before them, came to this country seeking hope...and change...to ensure themselves and their posterity a future of faith...and innovation...today we are here to proudly proclaim that...
MSNBC: I wet myself! Oh My God! He truly is the Messiah!
(TELEPROMPTER BREAKS DOWN AT THIS POINT)
HUSSEIN: And the um...well...the...you know...hope...and the...chickens...then we must...future...grapefruit...um...and...important...well...change...this...uh...liver spot...
CNN/CBS/MSNBC: We now interrupt this broadcast to take you to important breaking news in Lima, Ohio where the finalists in the Little Foofy Dogs Dressed Up Like Celebrities Contest are now arriving on stage....
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1 comment:
Broccoli Yo-momma better be careful, speaking about "change" in Cuba can get you shot. But I guess his kind of change would probably be ok with the Cuban gov't.
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