Thursday, November 04, 2010

HE'S LEAVIN' ON 40 JET PLANES


A small portion of Obama's press entourage arrives in Mumbai.

American presidents travel overseas. They've been doing it for a long time. Many great historical moments for our country and the world have come from this. Woodrow Wilson went to Versailles to help end WWI and deliver the address on his "Fourteen Points". FDR traveled to Cairo and Yalta during the midst of WWII and delivered his "Unconditional Surrender" ultimatum, as well as telling Soviet Dictator Joe Stalin, "Here, go ahead and enslave all of Eastern Europe." Eisenhower fulfilled a campaign promise to go to Korea during that war and said, "Brrrrrr, it's (expletive deleted) cold." JFK went to Berlin to deliver his famous "Ich bin ein Berliner"speech. Nixon was the first president to visit Red China despite the Cold War and Vietnam. Ronald Reagan told Gorbachev to, "Tear down this wall." Bush senior went to Japan and said, "BAAARRRFFFF!" And, of course, Teddy Roosevelt went to Cuba to deliver his legendary "CHARGE!" speech, he just wasn't president yet.

Now good old Barack "It's just money" Obama will travel with an entourage of 3,000 people on some 40 jet aircraft, the "greenest president ever" creating a larger "carbon footprint" than Memphis, Tennessee, and costing the U.S. taxpayer $200 million dollars per day. That's roughly ten times the amount Bush Junior's trip in 2006 cost. (Remember the good old days when Ben and I bitched about how much he was spending?) Just what we need in this time of the "Great Recession" and record deficits.

The purpose of the trip is, apparently, to "build important economic ties" with India, where 86% of the population makes less than $2 per day. I wonder how they'll feel about Michelle flouncing off Air Force 1 with her $6,000 handbag? Hopefully it isn't leather. Not that it would matter to the Obamas what others think, judging from the way Barack insulted just about every other Free World leader when he went to Europe. And snubbed the ceremony for the Fall of the Berlin Wall. Apparently, we can learn a lot from India then, as this is the direction America's job future is heading. Maybe Barack just wants to find out how they can have an economy like that without the peasants uprising. I guess he finally conceded that he doesn't have more important things to worry about than, "that economy stuff."
What immortal, historic lines will Barack deliver to the world on his trip? Perhaps he will imitate some of his famous campaign oratories; campaigning in 57 states, seeing dead people, his great grand uncle's liberation of Siberia, or needing a Japanese translator while there.

Perhaps the TOTUS (Teleprompter Of The United States) will break down and, while there is plenty of IT tech support in India, he might have to ad lib for a minute or two.

So, instead of "Ich bin Ein Berliner" or "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall." we have have immortalized such oratory as, "Um...well...we have...um...change...and then...um...hope...for the...uh...economy thing...um...Allah Akbar."



No comments: